Five Tips to Handle the Holidays After a Divorce

It’s the most wonderful time of the year!

 

But for people who have just gone through a divorce, they might be singing a different tune as they navigate their new normal around the holidays. 

 

If you’re recently divorced and aren’t quite sure how to handle the holidays, we have five helpful tips to consider to keep this time of year happy and bright.

 

Manage your mindset

 

A big factor in your happiness comes from managing your mindset. There are so many emotions at play during and after a divorce. More times than not, we feel sad and that’s completely normal. 

 

However, being cognizant of your emotions and managing your mindset to see the good in the holidays, despite your divorce can leave you feeling happy and whole. 

 

Take the time to enjoy the little things and remind yourself that you deserve happiness not just during the holidays, but always. 

 

Create new traditions

 

A divorce closes one chapter of your life and opens another. It’s in this new chapter that you can rewrite your old traditions and create new ones. While it’ll be hard to get past the initial sadness of your new normal and maybe not spending time with your kids on the actual holiday, not all is lost. You can let go of old traditions that didn’t provide you with any joy and instead, create new traditions for your kids to look forward to! Get creative and realize that the holiday is just one day out of 365. There are plenty of opportunities to create happy memories with your kids, not just around the holidays.  

 

Lean on family and friends

 

It can be easy to fall into the isolation trap. Maybe your kids are with your ex or you’re simply having a hard time coping with your divorce and being alone is how you handle these changes. All of these emotions are OK and normal. But, it’s important to not isolate yourself and dwell on the past. Now more than ever, you need to surround yourself with family and friends. Lean on the people closest to you as your support system to help you navigate the holidays and beyond.

Treat yourself 

 

Use the holidays as a jumping-off point to get back to putting yourself first! Binge-watch a new series on Netflix, head to the gym for a boost of endorphins, plan happy hours with your friends, buy yourself something nice. Whatever it may be, grab hold on the reigns of your new life and see where it takes you. The only way you can repair the wounds from your divorce is to actively treat yourself with grace and put yourself first. 

 

Quiet your mind

 

It’s so easy to only recall the good times of your marriage especially when you’re alone with your thoughts and have time to think.

 

We’re all guilty of thinking of the “good times” that we forget about the not-so-great aspects of the holidays like arguing about the in-laws staying at your house or your plans in general. 

 

Shutting out the bad memories sets you up for failure and sadness. 

 

To keep yourself grounded, you need to quiet your mind because that mindset doesn’t serve you. It hinders you and holds you back from moving on.

 

While there’s nothing wrong with recalling happy memories it’s important not to silence the bad and allow yourself to beat yourself up or put yourself down. 

If you need guidance and advice through your divorce proceedings, we can help. Contact us today.